As we all know, relationships can be pretty tricky, they’re wonderful, don’t get me wrong, the love, the excitement, the joy and happiness of having someone care for you in ‘that way’ is definitely all worthwhile but as these are things what we anticipate when entering a relationship, at times we can forget how difficult it can be to manage. Investing a large amount of ones time and emotions on another person can not only be difficult but also risky because you never know whether in the long run, those investments will produce but one thing I think we all tend unconsciously do during relationships is be over expectant.
I know, it’s a relationship, the other person has to live up to certain expectations and not just general things that are expected of a partner, but your own personal expectations. Truth is, expectations lead to disappointment and even though it’s important to stand your ground, it’s also equally important to learn how to manage expectations as this is a key factor to help a relationship maintain a steady sail.
Sometimes, a lot of people don’t know they have over expectations, it’s in the little things like ‘he should have texted me before I woke up’ or ‘she should have noticed my new belt’ these are little things that can lead to big problems in the future but learning to manage them will help not only reduce mental, but also emotional stress, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that if you’re extremely sick, you shouldn’t expect your partner to at least call and check up on you, those are expectations that matter.
Sometimes, when entering a new relationship, it helps to have no expectations at all, I know it seems bizzerk but if you enter with a clean canvas it’ll help you assess what the person is like, so you know what they can and can’t do, or what they’re used to doing so you don’t have expectations of them they won’t be able to live up to.
Communication is key. It greatly helps to negotiate and most importantly, communicate. Let your partner know your expectations, hear them out, they may be able to live up to them, and if not, be open to work it out. Sometimes, you may even need to have them tell you their expectations, so both of you can weigh everything.
Be open minded, just because things happened a certain way in your previous relationship doesn’t mean it will happen that way now, or because your friend’s relationship is going a particular way. Everybody is different and that is what makes relationships different.
Don’t expect your partner to change because the truth is, no one really has to do anything, I mean, they have to respect you and stay faithful and what not, okay there are lot of things they have to do but a lot they don’t and if you search inside you well, you’ll realize the things that aren’t important and the things you’re expecting and making a fuss about.
Remember, be open minded and communicate, and it should all work out in the end.