Do you ever feel no matter how much you do, you are not doing enough? No matter how much you have grown, you still don’t feel satisfied? Do you ever feel like your effort doesn’t matter; like no matter how much you give, people around still don’t appreciate it?

It could even have to do with your physical attributes. Are you tired of people thinking you don’t matter because you look a certain way?  Often times, our family or society makes us believe that “to be nice” is the most natural and needed thing for a girl. Which is why when we are around negative people, we think it is okay to be nice and accept their wrong perception of us.


Actress, Lupita Nyong’o did not let what people thought of her get to her. She kept working.

Speaking as she accepted her award for Best Breakthrough Performance at the annual Black Women in Hollywood Luncheon, she said: “I too remember a time when I would turn on the TV and only see pale skin. I got teased and taunted about my night shaded skin. And my one prayer to God, the miracle worker, was that I would wake up lighter skinned.

The morning would come and I would be so excited about seeing my new skin that I would refuse to look down at myself before I was in front of a mirror, because I wanted to see my fair face first. And every day I experienced just the same disappointment at being just as dark as I had been the day before.

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“I tried to negotiate with God. I told him I would stop steeling sugar cubes at night if he gave me what I wanted. I would listen to my mother’s every word and never lose my school sweater again if he just made me a little lighter. But, I guess God was unimpressed with my bargaining chips because I never woke up lighter.”

Finally I realised that beauty was not a thing that I could acquire or consume. It was something that I just had to be. And what my mother meant by saying that you can’t eat beauty is that you can’t rely on beauty to sustain you. You have to believe in your substance if others don’t.”

Lupita is now an award winning actress but some people still have problem with her skin colour. Imagine if she hadn’t lived her dream because of intimidation about what others thought of her.

If you know your worth, you feel happier; you are connected to the power you possess and can find a solution to any problem. A woman who doesn’t know her worth will doubt herself even when she is much more.


It takes strength and dedication to change your perspective from “always being accepting” to “doing and being what I want.”

Stop sacrificing your time and energy for what does not matter. Do anything because you want to, not because you have to and let go of the “have to” mentality.

You need to learn that you’ll never be good enough for the wrong people. You’ll never be good enough for your friends who are secretly jealous of your support system, personality or accomplishments.

You’ll never be good enough for your family who wants you to be just like them. You’ll never be good enough for the people who are too busy judging you. You’ll never be good enough for the people who see your strengths as weakness.

You’ll never be good enough for the people who refuse to see the light in you. And you’ll never be good enough for the people who don’t appreciate your beauty. Most importantly, you’ll never be good enough for the people who don’t love you for you.

And so, don’t wallow in misery because some people think you are not good enough. Stop bringing yourself down and sucking up to people who don’t matter, for you are enough being YOU!


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