Has it ever occurred to you that you will lose some battles, win some and life will go on? Do you know that some battles are to be left alone?
We all feel anger, but whether or not we act on it depends on a number of factors. Among them, confidence and discernment play a huge role. Sometimes our anger gets the best of us, and we argue and try to force things and situations without thinking it through. Knowing which battles to fight – and which to leave for another day, or even walk away from altogether – is critical to being successful in life.
If you find yourself fighting too many battles, on too many fronts, you will end up feeling drained of emotional, mental and physical energy. What’s more, both your work performance and your relationships with people will surely suffer as a result.
To start solving this problem, you need to find where you draw the line between letting something go and engaging in conflict.
- Only fight about issues that are truly important. Evaluate the consequences of an argument. Consider a few simple questions: “Is this worth addressing?” And, “Will I care about this tomorrow?” You should not argue for the sake of arguing.
- Make a plan.Take a moment to calm down and think through the problem. Don’t attack the other person. Convey your frustration and support your logical argument with facts and examples.
- Be sure you know what the problem is Review your motivation. Ask yourself, Is this really the problem or is something else bothering me? If you’re stressed about work or finances, you may be more irritable than usual.
- Don’t react immediately.Walk away from the situation for a few minutes. Calm down and consider what an argument will accomplish. If you choose to fight every battle, you’ll be seen as stubborn or argumentative.
- Choose the right time.Fighting in public will rarely have a positive outcome. Find a quiet place to vent your frustrations in private so you can have an honest conversation without outside pressure.
- Compromise.Sometimes compromise seems impossible. Stay positive and defuse the situation with humor, whenever possible.
You must understand that not every situation is worth fighting about. Not every relationship is worth holding onto. Your peace, joy and total well-being matters and that is the ultimate.