I am guilty as charged! Yes I was an invited guest at #BAAD2017 of course I saw everything that took place, from the guest lists the men in their chic Agbada, hehehe I won’t mention the guy that stole the show but wow! What a beautiful wedding! Did I mention that I was invited through social media? Yes! I followed it on my instagram, and knowing some guests at the wedding, I relied on their pages to give me more news about what was happening! However, this wedding as many Nigerian weddings got me thinking a lot about my home country Kenya. Do we have the wedding culture and values instilled in us? As I type this, my hands are already trembling because am sure that the back lush I will get from my country people will be enough to end the year 2017,lol!
First of all introduction, this is basically the wedding before the wedding, normally after the proposal. This ceremony in Nigeria is flamboyant and colourful, filled with a lot of activities. Its major purpose is to enable the families of both the bride and groom to be get to know each other better. In it,there are performances by various artistes and music played in Nigerian dialects, be it Yoruba or Igbo. My favorite part about these parties is that there is excessively money dropping to the bride and the women in attendance! Unfortunately, back at home all that happens during this phase is that a few people who are key family members gather together and voila!The introduction is done. Yes, there will be food and drinks but much will be saved for a later day, the white wedding. What kills me the most is that little is taken into consideration when it comes to this; it is more like a formal occasion, limited to time and resources. I am yet to count the number of traditional artistes let alone the new age artistes who grace such occasions; the likes of Tony Nyadundo and Ken Wamaria! The whole point of this celebration should be to appreciate our culture and have fun in dressing and dancing.
Then the engagement ceremony whereby the groom’s family comes back with dowry as agreed in the introduction ceremony and more gifts for the bride’s people. The bride in this instance would be given wine to take to her husband making the ceremony more fun. I am well aware that back home the women in the bride’s age group are given lesos and the groom is made to identify his bride, whereby if he fails he is given a fine, so kudos but we can do much better! This ceremony is key as it helps unite the two families bringing them even closer as they would have interacted severally. The ogas don’t go cheap on this either, they indeed make it a celebration worth remembering. Nonetheless, I have to commend my friends from Central Kenya and the Maasai for embracing culture and tradition in ruracio and shuka!
Every girls’ dream is to have a breath taking white wedding, somewhere by the beach, enjoying the soothing relaxation brought by the breeze away from all the chaos in the city. Simply put, Kenyan men listen and listen very well, we, ok I want a destination wedding! This wedding is the grand finale and it has to be spectacular. I know the major concern here is the budget but look at it this way, you don’t have to invite those people you don’t like. That is how a destination wedding works, not everyone can attend it. It’s all about the people who matter in your life and just the two of you, cealing your marriage within a romantic atmosphere! The extra mile to it is that such weddings make it to the tabloids. 90% of the women I know follow social platforms like Bellanaija or Nigerian weddings admiring the elegance and class put into destination weddings. I will take one for the team and say this; we want our dream weddings, is that too much to ask for?